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The Lord is Engaged

Benson C Saili
THIS EARTH, MY BROTHER…

 … on the occasion of the so-called “Wedding at Cana”

In March AD 30, Jesus turned 36 years of age, having been born in March 7 BC (there was no year 0: the transition proceeded straight from 1 BC to 1 AD, the AD era having begun with the birth of James the brother of Jesus, who unlike Jesus was born in the month of the year befitting of a dynastic heir, this being September).

Being a messianic heir, this was a significant date. A messianic heir (that is, the Davidic heir and the priestly heir) was supposed to be married between ages 36 and 40 at the most, the latter being referred to as a generation year. It was mandatory for the messianic heir to produce his own heir within this 4-year period. 

The four-year window allowed for the odds of siring at least one son as girls did not inherit. It also allowed for ample testing of the woman’s fertility: if she could not produce a child within this period, the marriage was terminated by legal divorce.

STAGES OF THE  MARRIAGE PROCESS

The Essenes, the religio-politico grouping to which Jesus belonged, had laid down very strict rules with respect to messianic heirs. Messianic heirs were never to indulge in sex for purposes of pleasure: it was for procreation only. Messianic heirs were therefore celibates in the grand scheme of things.

They were allowed to sleep with their wives only if the appointed time had arrived for them to produce a child. The time for both the marriage and the reproduction was strictly demarcated. First, there was a betrothal ceremony.

This took place between march and June. Then there was a First Marriage. This happened in September, the holiest month in the Jewish calendar. But the First Marriage did not permit a live-together: the couple only came under the same roof only in December, when intimate relations commenced with a view to conception on the part of the female spouse  so that the child should be born in September the following year.

The First Marriage was also referred to as a trial marriage. Thus, if the female spouse did not conceive in December, copulation was suspended till the following December. The couple were to live separately all the while, though technically they were regarded as husband and wife from the day of  betrothal.

If betrothal was to be terminated, it would require a formal divorce. A trial marriage was allowed for a maximum of three years, whereupon if the female spouse did not conceive, the marriage was annulled by way of divorce.  Divorce was necessary because Essenes did not countenance   the idea of polygamy.

On the other hand, if conception did take place in at least one December during the three-year trial marriage, a Second Marriage was held in March. By this time, the spouse was three months pregnant and as such,  the chances of a miscarriage were very low.

After the Second Wedding, the union was final and irrevocable: divorce was forbidden as royal marriages were meant to last “till death do us part”. A messianic spouse therefore was always three months pregnant at the time of her second and therefore final wedding.

Although she was already pregnant, she was still referred to as a Virgin titularly. She only ceased to be called a Virgin at six months of pregnancy, that is, in June, when she now assumed the title of Mother. Resultantly, all Davidic spouses – Mary the Mother of Jesus; Mary Magdalene; and Mary-Cleopas, the wife of James the brother of Jesus, were all referred to as Mother Mary.  

GROOM-ED FROM CHILDHOOD

The woman who had been earmarked for Jesus to wed was Mary, the daughter of Helena-Salome, a Gentile of renown from Syro-Phoenicia. In antiquity, a future king’s bride was chosen when she was practically a tiny tot. For example, Herod the Great had long chosen Herodias for his then favourite son and therefore heir apparent Herod Philip I, best known as the disciple Thomas in the gospels.

Typically, a dynastic bride was chosen from the immediate extended family so that King and Queen would be cousins or uncle and niece. In the case of Herodias, she was a niece to Thomas. But in a bid to cement diplomatic relations and therefore forestall the possibility of armed hostilities, a bride might be chosen from a foreign dynasty.  A case in point is Herod Antipas, the tetrarch (quarter-king) of Galilee and Perea, whose first wife was Phasaelis, the daughter of King Aretas IV of Nabataea (modern-day Jordan).

In the case of Jesus, however, convention was flouted: he chose a commoner and a Gentile for that matter as his bride. This is one reason Mary Magdalene was so viscerally loathed by the apostles, particularly Simon Peter, Judas Iscariot, and Paul. His father Joseph, on the other hand, had loyally heeded convention by marrying a Hasmonean princess in his (Jesus’s) mother.

In truth, however, Mary Magdalene was neither a commoner nor a Gentile.  She was royalty proper, far much more than any blue-blooded Jewish lass. Her real father was an Anunnaki and the Anunnaki were the gods of the Old Testament, which might explain why Helena gave her the name Mary, which meant “First Lady”, “First Princess”, or simply “Queen”. 

Even in New Testament times, the Anunnaki were around but operated behind the scenes, from which they subtly and systematically charted the course of Earthly affairs.  It was because Mary Magdalene had Anunnaki blood that Helena-Salome was unstinting in seeing to it that she married her off  to the future King of Israel who was at once the future King of the world.

Jesus must have taken Mary Magdalene’s Anunnaki stock into account when he succumbed to Helena’s overtures to marry her. Beauty was not an irrelevant factor either: as half-human, half-Anunnaki, Mary Magdalene was white skinned, that is, a Caucasian, which enhanced her aesthetic appeal compared to the genetically dark-skinned Jews of the day.    

To ensure Mary Magdalene met the grade as Jesus’s  wife when she came of age, Helena put her in conventual sisterhood at Qumran from a very young age. The Essene convent into which she was placed was that of the Mary’s in the female order of Dan. Mary’s were groomed as future spouses for monarchs, princes, and other members of the nobility. The female head of the order of  Dan was Mary the mother of Jesus. But overall, the Mary’s were overseen by men. Altogether, there were seven men who supervised them. 

They all were Zealots but were metaphorically known as the Seven Demons or Seven Satans. “Demon” and “Satan” were alternative terms for Zealots, the military wing of the Essenes who sought to overthrow the Romans by force of arms but were neutralised by highly influential pacifists such as Jesus and John the Baptist. 

The Seven Demons were headed by the Essenes’ Chief Scribe, who also went by the title Demon No. 7.  In gospel times, Demon No. 7 was Judas Iscariot. Judas, whose other title was the Jairus, was therefore Mary Magdalene’s principal, another reason why she was also referred to as “Jairus’s daughter”.

Mary Magdalene was very rich in that her mother was wealthy. By tactfully and strategically inserting her into the order of Dan, it now meant she no longer was eligible to inherit her mother’s wealth as an individual. Whatever would be bequeathed to her would vest in the Essene fraternity as members of the order of Dan were not allowed to own individual property. But Helena didn’t mind the pauperish situation into which she had thrust her daughter. As the future Queen, Mary Magdalene would be even wealthier than her mother.  When people said Helena was a schemer, it wasn’t simply a mere stereotype.

TURNING WATER INTO WINE

Yet if Jesus had to marry a Gentile, that Gentile had to be approved by the Father of the Essene community, the Pope. In AD 29, the Pope was John the Baptist. John, however, was a puritan. If Jesus was a Davidic messiah, there was simply no way he was going to be allowed to consort with a Gentile woman. Moreover, John and Jesus were at this time at loggerheads with each other, with the result that Jesus had broken away from John to form a rival party.  John had in fact de-recognised Jesus as the Davidic messiah in favour of his younger brother James.  

Since John the Baptist was not seeing eye to eye with his equally great cousin, Jesus decided to assume the role of priest-king at least for the purpose of his beloved Mary Magdalene. In doing so, he had the support of his principal associate Simon Zelotes, who was the foster father of Mary Magdalene. 

Thus when Mary Magdalene came of age at 12 and underwent the Bar Mitzvah ceremony, Jesus performed another rite on her.  He elevated her from figurative death (the unregenerated Gentile state) into the community of life (the Essene state in the sight of God). This initiation is recorded in MATTHEW 9:18-25 though it has been grossly misinterpreted as raising “Jairus’s daughter from the dead”.

As far as Jesus was concerned, this was no big deal as his notion of the Kingdom of God embraced Gentiles as much as it did Jews. In any case, even the great Jewish patriarchs of old had consorted with Gentiles. With the rite performed, Mary Magdalene was now not only admitted into the Jewish fold (“grafted onto Israel” as the apostle Paul would say) but she was also effectively unofficially engaged to Jesus, though official engagement required its own ceremony.

Jesus’s official betrothal to Mary Magdalene took place at “Cana”, which was a structure at Qumran where women and Gentles were allowed and where Mary the mother of Jesus was the Mother Superior of the female convent. The incident is related in JOHN 2:1-12.

Although, it is called a wedding, it was actually not: it was a sacred meal that preceded the betrothal. The bride and groom are not expressly mentioned. This was  deliberate: somebody didn’t want to put it in no uncertain terms that the groom was Jesus and the bride was Mary Magdalene. But it is clear that a matrimonial ceremony involving a member of Jesus family is going on as his mother is clearly the hostess and Jesus  himself takes centre stage.

The Essene betrothal custom was for there to be a formal host (as  appears in the account), who would be in full charge as the Ruler of the Feast. Secondary authority rested only in the bridegroom and his mother, and this is entirely relevant for when the matter of the communion wine arose, Jesus’s mother said to the  servants (JOHN 2:5), “Whatsoever he saith unto you, do it”. No invited guest would have had any such right of command. It is plain,  therefore, that  Jesus and the bridegroom were one and the same.

The event is referred to as a wedding because betrothal was as binding as  a marriage proper. It was in fact a dual ceremony. First, Jesus initiated a class of people who Essenes regarded as unclean into the “Drink of the Congregation”, which was a kind of communion.

These were married men, novices Gentiles, and all lay Jews. At such a ceremony, the unclean were not eligible to partake of the wine: they were restricted to a ritual bathing with water only (that’s why there were so many jars of water). Only already initiated Jewish celibates were allowed to drink wine.  

Jesus, a radical reformist,  would have none of that. To him, there was no longer a divide between the clean and the unclean. All were equal before the sight of God. Jesus therefore allowed the unclean to partake of the wine too. In Qumran language, the act of allowing unclean persons to drink wine at a communion was referred to as “turning water into wine.” This was called a “miracle” by virtue not of its wondrousness but of its strange, aberrational nature.    

In such a Gentile-friendly setting, it is little wonder that Jesus decided to betroth the Gentile Mary Magdalene to underline that she too had been received into the exalted Jewish-Essene fold and was therefore worthy of his bride.  

NEXT WEEK: THE NUPTIALS

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Export Processing Zones: How to Get SEZA to Sizzle

23rd September 2020
Export Processing Zone (EPZ) factory in Kenya

In 2005, the Business & Economic Advisory Council (BEAC) pitched the idea of the establishment of Special Economic Zones (SEZs) to the Mogae Administration.

It took five years before the SEZ policy was formulated, another five years before the relevant law was enacted, and a full three years before the Special Economic Zones Authority (SEZA) became operational.

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Egypt Bagged Again

23rd September 2020
Samson

… courtesy of infiltration stratagem by Jehovah-Enlil’s clan

With the passing of Joshua’s generation, General Atiku, the promised peace and prosperity of a land flowing with milk and honey disappeared, giving way to chaos and confusion.

Maybe Joshua himself was to blame for this shambolic state of affairs. He had failed to mentor a successor in the manner Moses had mentored him. He had left the nation without a central government or a human head of state but as a confederacy of twelve independent tribes without any unifying force except their Anunnaki gods.

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‘RO, ‘RO ‘RO YOUR ‘BOT

23rd September 2020

If I say the word ‘robot’ to you,  I can guess what would immediately spring to mind –  a cute little Android or animal-like creature with human or pet animal characteristics and a ‘heart’, that is to say to say a battery, of gold, the sort we’ve all seen in various movies and  tv shows.  Think R2D2 or 3CPO in Star Wars, Wall-E in the movie of the same name,  Sonny in I Robot, loveable rogue Bender in Futurama,  Johnny 5 in Short Circuit…

Of course there are the evil ones too, the sort that want to rise up and eliminate us  inferior humans – Roy Batty in Blade Runner, Schwarzenegger’s T-800 in The Terminator,  Box in Logan’s Run,  Police robots in Elysium and  Otomo in Robocop.

And that’s to name but a few.  As a general rule of thumb, the closer the robot is to human form, the more dangerous it is and of course the ultimate threat in any Sci-Fi movie is that the robots will turn the tables and become the masters, not the mechanical slaves.  And whilst we are in reality a long way from robotic domination, there are an increasing number of examples of  robotics in the workplace.

ROBOT BLOODHOUNDS Sometimes by the time that one of us smells something the damage has already begun – the smell of burning rubber or even worse, the smell of deadly gas. Thank goodness for a robot capable of quickly detecting and analyzing a smell from our very own footprint.

A*Library Bot The A*Star (Singapore) developed library bot which when books are equipped with RFID location chips, can scan shelves quickly seeking out-of-place titles.  It manoeuvres with ease around corners, enhances the sorting and searching of books, and can self-navigate the library facility during non-open hours.

DRUG-COMPOUNDING ROBOT Automated medicine distribution system, connected to the hospital prescription system. It’s goal? To manipulate a large variety of objects (i.e.: drug vials, syringes, and IV bags) normally used in the manual process of drugs compounding to facilitate stronger standardisation, create higher levels of patient safety, and lower the risk of hospital staff exposed to toxic substances.

AUTOMOTIVE INDUSTRY ROBOTS Applications include screw-driving, assembling, painting, trimming/cutting, pouring hazardous substances, labelling, welding, handling, quality control applications as well as tasks that require extreme precision,

AGRICULTURAL ROBOTS Ecrobotix, a Swiss technology firm has a solar-controlled ‘bot that not only can identify weeds but thereafter can treat them. Naio Technologies based in southwestern France has developed a robot with the ability to weed, hoe, and assist during harvesting. Energid Technologies has developed a citrus picking system that retrieves one piece of fruit every 2-3 seconds and Spain-based Agrobot has taken the treachery out of strawberry picking. Meanwhile, Blue River Technology has developed the LettuceBot2 that attaches itself to a tractor to thin out lettuce fields as well as prevent herbicide-resistant weeds. And that’s only scratching the finely-tilled soil.

INDUSTRIAL FLOOR SCRUBBERS The Global Automatic Floor Scrubber Machine boasts a 1.6HP motor that offers 113″ water lift, 180 RPM and a coverage rate of 17,000 sq. ft. per hour

These examples all come from the aptly-named site www.willrobotstakemyjob.com    because while these functions are labour-saving and ripe for automation, the increasing use of artificial intelligence in the workplace will undoubtedly lead to increasing reliance on machines and a resulting swathe of human redundancies in a broad spectrum of industries and services.

This process has been greatly boosted by the global pandemic due to a combination of a workforce on furlough, whether by decree or by choice, and the obvious advantages of using virus-free machines – I don’t think computer viruses count!  For example, it was suggested recently that their use might have a beneficial effect in care homes for the elderly, solving short staffing issues and cheering up the old folks with the novelty of having their tea, coffee and medicines delivered by glorified model cars.  It’s a theory, at any rate.

Already, customers at the South-Korean  fast-food chain No Brand Burger can avoid any interaction with a human server during the pandemic.  The chain is using robots to take orders, prepare food and bring meals out to diners.  Customers order and pay via touchscreen, then their request is sent to the kitchen where a cooking machine heats up the buns and patties. When it’s ready, a robot ‘waiter’ brings out their takeout bag.   

‘This is the first time I’ve actually seen such robots, so they are really amazing and fun,’ Shin Hyun Soo, an office worker at No Brand in Seoul for the first time, told the AP. 

Human workers add toppings to the burgers and wrap them up in takeout bags before passing them over to yellow-and-black serving robots, which have been compared to Minions. 

Also in Korea, the Italian restaurant chain Mad for Garlic is using serving robots even for sit-down customers. Using 3D space mapping and other technology, the electronic ‘waiter,’ known as Aglio Kim, navigates between tables with up to five orders.  Mad for Garlic manager Lee Young-ho said kids especially like the robots, which can carry up to 66lbs in their trays.

These catering robots look nothing like their human counterparts – in fact they are nothing more than glorified food trolleys so using our thumb rule from the movies, mankind is safe from imminent takeover but clearly  Korean hospitality sector workers’ jobs are not.

And right there is the dichotomy – replacement by stealth.  Remote-controlled robotic waiters and waitresses don’t need to be paid, they don’t go on strike and they don’t spread disease so it’s a sure bet their army is already on the march.

But there may be more redundancies on the way as well.  Have you noticed how AI designers have an inability to use words of more than one syllable?  So ‘robot’ has become ‘bot’ and ‘android’ simply ‘droid?  Well, guys, if you continue to build machines ultimately smarter than yourselves you ‘rons  may find yourself surplus to requirements too – that’s ‘moron’ to us polysyllabic humans”!

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