“Why I Hope My Doctor Is Off Having a Cup of Tea”
DR BOIMA
HEALTH ISSUES
The best news to ever come out of the internet this week is a story by a British blogger named Jodie Hardwick, which can almost bring one to tears. I could not have said it better.
The insults, swearing and treatment we, health professionals sometimes suffer at the hands of those who have come to seek help from us (and those we sacrifice a lot for) is uncalled for. Ironical! The abuse is even worse in Government health facilities. In my observation, trying to explain why the doctor is late or absent at a particular time or place where they are expected yields more insults from the ‘stable’ mob waiting.
Doctors every day throughout the world are being scolded for being away handling an emergency somewhere, for taking a toilet break, for squeezing in a meal in their busy schedule, for being on the phone seeking clarity or second opinion about a patient. If everyone could appreciate just one good thing a doctor has ever done for them like this lady and try not to let impatience run away with their rationality, the world would be a much better place to live. It is called appreciation! Below is Jodie’s testimony.
“The other day, I was in a hospital waiting room waiting for an ultrasound appointment. There was a couple next to me, and they were not happy. Apparently, as the whole waiting room were finding out: their doctor was running late. After sighing repeatedly, getting up to ask the receptionist about 14 times how long they would be and talking very loudly about how 'f***ing useless [the medical staff] all are', the man turned to me, as if somehow we were kindred spirits, and said "forty f***ing' minutes late! You know fully well they're all just in there having a cup of tea or faffing about with paperwork.
You can't possibly be running forty minutes late at ten thirty in the morning". He looked at me and waited for me to agree with him and join in the ruthless slander on the National Health Service (NHS). I shrugged "Well, I certainly hope so" I said, before turning back to the seven year old copy of Heat I had found (did you know that Katie and Peter have split up?).
Realizing that he had not found his new BFF, the man went back to moaning loudly to his disinterested girlfriend, and didn't press me on whether I had just said what he thought I'd said. But I did say it, and I did hope it. I did hope that his doctor was off surfing Facebook or 'faffing about' with paperwork.
I'll explain.
When I was 27 weeks pregnant with the youngest baby H, I was at a family party when I started bleeding. A lot. After screaming for my husband, both he and my Mum rushed me to hospital. I rang on the way, bordering on hysterical, and was told by a kind and efficient midwife to come straight to the delivery ward where they would be waiting for me. They were, as I walked through the doors, a doctor and several midwives were there waiting, and rushed me in to triage without wasting a second.
As I lay on the bed, crying and waiting to hear that we had lost our precious unborn baby, I was introduced to our doctor, Elizabeth, who immediately tried to find our daughter's heartbeat. Within minutes someone had located a scanner and she was able to show us that she was still alive in there. In a ridiculous blur of activity, I was checked over, attached to a monitor and told a flurry of information that I didn't hear a word of. All I did hear is that there was a large possibility that they were going to need to deliver that night.
When a sudden extra gush of blood came, I was rushed in another room where I was then attached to a drip, and a number of other medically things that to this day I can't remember what they all were. Within half an hour of stepping foot through the doors, on a Saturday night, I was introduced to a stream of medical professionals: an anesthetist, someone from NICU, and more doctors and nurses.
I couldn't really take any of it in, but I knew our situation was dangerous and they were doing everything they could to keep me and my tiny baby safe. That same night I was given steroids for the baby's lungs, magnesium to protect her brain, and was monitored non-stop for 24 hours.
Long story short, they didn't need to deliver that night. The bleeding stopped and it emerged that the baby was OK. We weren't totally out of the woods, but for now we were going to be OK. I was kept in for five days, three of which I was on 24 hour monitoring, with a midwife in our room at nearly all times and checks being done hourly. After six days, I was allowed to leave. A bit shaken up, but ok.
We were told that no-one could be sure whether it would happen again. I would need to go for extra scans for the rest of my pregnancy to monitor the baby and me, but potentially that could be the end of it until we delivered. It wasn't. Two weeks later I bled again, luckily much lighter, but it still called for another three day admission. I was let out, only to be back in two days later, and so it continued. In total I was admitted and let out again seven times.
During our multiple stays in there, we were treated by a steady of doctors, midwives and care assistants. When my husband wasn't there when I was taken in on our third bleed, one of the midwives didn't go for her tea break and held my hand whilst a doctor checked me over. I was allocated a consultant, a very cool German, Boris Johnson-esque man who was straight talking but made me laugh.
He explained that the reason they weren't delivering was because our baby was safe, and showed no signs of being affected by all of it, so for now she was safer inside me than out. Every time I was admitted, he would come and see me several times to see how I was doing. No matter how many people needed him, and how busy he was, he would come and see me.
On the fifth (perhaps, who knows at this point) admission, the bleed that had led me to be in there again had been heavy, and I was starting to lose faith. I started telling myself that no matter they were saying, our baby was not going to be OK. No one could bleed this much and still be ok. I felt like shit, and I was on the verge of totally falling apart.
One of the doctors in my consultant's team, Eli, came in just doing the normal rounds that they did every day. I don't know whether she just is like this to everyone, or whether she could see I wasn't handling it so well anymore. But instead of the usual two minute run through of what was going on, the same polite smile and then leave, she stayed for ages and told me things were going to be OK.
She explained why the baby really was safer inside, and what was going to happen. She stayed and answered a thousand questions and didn't leave until I was done. She didn't tell me that she had a million more important things to do and that I was wasting her time.
When it was decided that I would eventually deliver, at 35 weeks, my midwife spent her break finding me ice because I kept saying how much I needed it. Eli, the same Dr as before, supervised the whole thing and came in throughout my labor to check if I was doing OK because she knew I wasn't. When my waters had to be broken and it was uncertain whether I would start to bleed again and need an emergency section, a team of specialists were outside our hospital room to jump into action just in case.
Here's the thing: none of those people 'had the time'. When I came in, bleeding and terrified at 27 weeks, no doctors or midwives would have been scheduled on purely to keep my baby alive. As a result of preventing me from bleeding to death, another patient was probably kept waiting for Elizabeth.
Somebody's scheduled C-Section was probably held up whilst it was determined whether my 27 week old fetus needed to be delivered. No midwives would have been timetabled to stay at my bedside constantly to make sure things didn't go downhill.
When I was not holding it together, Eli probably didn't have the time to sit and answer a thousand of my irrational questions. Someone was probably rude to her as a result of being kept waiting because of me. Someone was kept waiting because my consultant was making the decision that delivering my baby was the safest way of making sure she survived.
Since talking to other people about my time in NHS, I have been inundated with stories of the same nature. My friend went for a scan on her twins to be told one had passed away. Her sonographer stayed with her for 45 minutes while she cried and waited to be told by a doctor what was going to happen. Her appointment would have been scheduled to be 15 minutes long.
A client of mine, who had lost a baby previously, told me how her community midwife cancelled everything when she went in to labor early when her husband was overseas with the military and had no-one there with her. When another friend was told she had cancer, her GP didn't tell her that her ten minutes was up and she needed to stop crying and leave his office so that his next patient wasn't kept waiting.
I am certainly no expert on the NHS, and I have no valid information when it comes to budget cuts. I know the increasing numbers of cuts are bad, and I know patients are missing out because of it. I know Jeremy Hunt is trying to blame much of the failings on all those 'lazy, greedy doctors'.
Whilst I know the latter to be mostly bollocks, I don't know enough about the goings on in UK hospitals to have any real opinion on any of that side of it. But what I do know is that when I and my tiny offspring needed them, they were there for us. Yes, there were times I was kept waiting. There were times I was told someone would be there in the morning and I didn't see them until the evening. But when we needed them, they were there. And as a result, my baby is here now and i will never stop being thankful for them.
So now, whenever I'm kept waiting, I hope to God that it’s because my doctor is off playing solitaire or washing his Mercedes. I hope that they're running late because they're surfing Facebook and drinking coffee.
The alternative – and let’s face it, the truth – is that someone needs them at that moment and they can't get away. The chances are they have to deal with something that they can't get away from and they can't just walk out of because they're running late.
They don't have the option to deal with it next week because they have better things to do right now. People's lives don't wait. How much more convenient is it to think, as my dear friend from the waiting room said, that those 'lazy, useless doctors' are wasting his time 'faffing about'.
I hope they are. If those doctors and nurses, midwives and healthcare assistants are off wasting time doing paperwork and chatting, it means that they aren't helping another person who's life is falling apart, and that perhaps somewhere, someone like me is absolutely terrified and facing the possibility that they're about to lose their perfect little baby”.
WeekendLife
Radio titans gloss RB2
In a thrilling turn of events, former YFM on-air presenter Petula Khulman, now known as Petula El’Kindiy, is set to co-host the morning show with the station’s current star, Thabo Bolokwe, fondly referred to as T.H.A.B.O. Petula’s radio journey began at Yarona FM and spanned over a year and a half, during which she honed her skills and developed a loyal fan base.
Petula, a Media Studies graduate from Rhodes University, holds a wealth of experience in the industry. Her career took her across borders, from Yarona FM to Gabz FM, and even to a community radio station, Bay FM. She later returned to YFM, where she hosted a show called The Plaground.
Her latest venture, “The Morning Essentials,” kicked off on July 1, 2020. The show, which airs from 3am to 5am on weekdays and 6am to 10am on Saturdays, quickly gained popularity among listeners. Petula attributes her success to her passion for media, music, and dance, as well as her appreciation for her colleagues at YFM.
However, her journey wasn’t without its challenges. In 2023, her work permit was denied by South African authorities, leading to a temporary pause in her radio career. Despite the setback, Petula remains undeterred and is ready to bring her bubbly personality and captivating voice back to the airwaves of RB2.
Adding to the excitement, Khumo ‘Missgeekays’ Kgwaadira is also making a comeback. The popular media personality and businesswoman, who was last heard on RB2 in October 2022, will be back on air from Monday. Missgeekays, who owns a restaurant called Kana Kgang, has been keeping herself busy with various ventures, including a stint as a freelance presenter.
Her return to RB2 is eagerly anticipated, and her fans are thrilled to hear that she will be back in her familiar mid-morning slot. The exact details of her show are still under wraps, but one thing is for sure – with the new lineup, RB2 is poised to make a big splash in the radio landscape.
“With the new lineup, RB2 will be the biggest thing ever. We expect fireworks and amusement from the morning through mid-morning and the afternoons. All the faces that are returning to the airwaves will contribute to the radio station’s growth and a snowballing of listenership,” a source close to the station revealed.
So, get ready for a thrilling ride as RB2 unveils its new look and lineup this coming Monday. With Petula El’Kindiy and Khumo ‘Missgeekays’ Kgwaadira leading the charge, there’s no doubt that RB2 is back, and it’s bigger and better than ever!
WeekendLife
Strawberry Ritual: An unconventional key to virtual interview success
In the modern era of swift communication, where digital platforms have become the cornerstone of professional interactions, mastering the nuances of a Zoom interview is a vital skill for job applicants. The pivot towards remote work has rendered platforms like Zoom indispensable for establishing connections with prospective employers. So, imagine if we told you that a humble fruit could be the secret ingredient to enhancing your self-assurance and excelling in that virtual interview? Indeed, the fruit in question is the strawberry!
“A whopping 59.1% of the workforce prefers remote work over a conventional office setting,” asserts Forbes, a staggering fact that underscores the global trend of working from home. In the UK, Zoom witnessed a dramatic surge in its daily active users (DAU), peaking at approximately 1.7 million around the end of November 2020. This significant upswing in DAU coincided with the onset of the coronavirus outbreak in the UK, as more individuals began participating in virtual meetings for both work and social engagements with their families and friends.
But how does a strawberry fit into this narrative? What might seem like a punchline to a whimsical joke could revolutionize your approach to virtual job interviews. CEO Chantry Somtun of JustBanter shares this ingenious trick that could make a world of difference.
According to CEO Chantry Somtun of JustBanter, consuming a strawberry before your Zoom call could have a profound impact on your performance. The National Institute of Health has discovered that strawberries contain folate, a compound that aids in calming nerves and reducing anxiety by stimulating the production of serotonin, a hormone crucial for maintaining a positive mood and mental well-being. Moreover, strawberries are teeming with anthocyanins, antioxidants that enhance brain and emotional health, making them an excellent choice for those seeking to alleviate stress and anxiety before significant virtual meetings.
So, how can you incorporate this simple yet potent trick into your pre-Zoom routine? It’s as straightforward as savoring a few fresh strawberries 10-20 minutes before your call. If fresh strawberries are unavailable, frozen ones or even a refreshing strawberry smoothie can serve as excellent alternatives. For the best results, consume the strawberries on an empty stomach to ensure faster absorption of folate and maximize their mood-enhancing benefits.
Beyond just soothing your nerves before a critical interview, strawberries offer a myriad of health benefits, such as being rich in antioxidants, vitamins, and minerals that contribute to overall well-being. By integrating strawberries into your pre-Zoom ritual, you can not only boost your confidence but also support your body’s health in the process.
In a competitive job market where first impressions matter, adopting this unconventional yet effective strategy could be the game-changer you need to distinguish yourself and leave a lasting impression on potential employers. Therefore, the next time you have a Zoom interview scheduled, reach for some strawberries and experience the positive difference they can make in enhancing your confidence and performance.
In a world where virtual connections have become the new norm, utilizing simple yet powerful techniques like the strawberry trick can set you apart and help you navigate the challenges of virtual job interviews with ease. By capitalizing on the natural benefits of this humble fruit, you can elevate your Zoom confidence to unprecedented heights and pave the way for success in your job search. So, why not seize the day? Grab some strawberries, take a bite, and witness your Zoom interview game soar to new heights!
WeekendLife
Mrs Botswana’s ‘MO’ to gender parity
Mrs. Portiah S Mokgathong, an illustrious beacon brightening the corners of Botswana, wields her vision for gender equity and empowerment like a torch, illuminating paths for her community. Standing at the helm of the Anaya-Tlhwatlhwa Foundation, and donning multiple hats as an international personal wellness coach, a savvy business magnate, and the esteemed Mrs. Botswana 2023/24, her mission is to cast rays of change into the lives she touches.
Her strategy for bridging the gender divide is both comprehensive and visionary. Mokgathong, understanding the vitality of lifting women and girls, equally champions the cause of young boys and men. She advocates for a culture of mutual admiration and understanding across gender lines, fostering a society unbound by the shackles of conventional gender roles—a society where balance and harmony reign supreme.
In her magnum opus, a collaborative venture with entities like NAPHA, Men and Boys for Gender Justice, the Botswana Police Service, and Girls for Girls Botswana, lies a quest for familial empowerment. Her goal is to fortify the foundation of families, supporting parents and guardians, sons and daughters alike, equipping them with the capabilities to forge strong intrapersonal and professional bonds.
“My project is family oriented, we want to focus on the family as a whole, we want to help both parents or guardians, men and women and the children of households both boy and girl. I am passionate in doing so because lately women and the girl child have been given a pedestal, they have been given a lot of help and a lot of recognition while men are considered as perpetrators and young boys are neglected, therefore we want to groom both the girl and boy child so that they grow up to be able to interact with each other and when they get to relationships, be it personal or work wise,†she said.
Mokgathong’s reach extends further than mere intervention; she invests in the empowerment of individuals through education, skill development, and the allocation of resources crucial for autonomy and enduring triumphs. By nurturing innate capabilities, igniting the flames of innovation, and promoting entrepreneurship, she sets the stage for marginalized communities to emerge from the shadows of dependency, crafting their own realms of prosperity.
“As we educate a girl child to be strong and independent, we also enable a young man or boy to be able to accept that strong independent woman, ensuring that the equation is balanced. I also want to help stop gender-based violence while protecting our children. When I began my initiative, it was based on GBV and child protection, but it developed into campaigning for the less fortunate and vulnerable,†she stresses.
Her journey, fraught with hurdles, including early disappointments in her pursuit of the Mrs. Botswana title, stands testament to her resilience and indomitable spirit. Gratitude fills her heart for mentors, sponsors, kin, and comrades whose support has sculpted her into the powerhouse she is today.
She says: “People want to be involved with you when you are a top finalist or the reigning queen. When I first started, I was only a person, and it was difficult and time-consuming to generate cash, solicit donations, and obtain obligation, particularly in rural areas. But right now, as the reigning queen it is a bit easier to reach out to collaborators and sponsors and I pray to God that as I am continuing with my project after crowning the new queen it will continue to be so and growth and more people will be willing to invest and help out.â€
Juggling her myriad roles demands the prowess of a maestro, yet Mokgathong thrives by weaving her family into her philanthropic endeavors and mastering the art of time management. She empowers young aspirants to self-reflect, establish objectives, harness mentorship and sponsorship, and gear up for the trials that lie ahead.
As Mrs. Botswana, her ambition soars beyond personal accolades; it’s tethered to the upliftment of her nation through the empowerment of women, the nurturing of men’s talents, and the preparation of the youth for a flourishing future. She envisages expanding the Anaya-Tlhwatlhwa Foundation’s influence, delving deeper into rural engagements to sow seeds of empowerment and hope for generations yet to come.
“For charity work to be more effective, I believe we need to empower other than just giving. We need to empower the less privileged and the vulnerable, with the right skills and knowledge so that they can sustain themselves in the long run. We need to help those who are talented and innovative. I am proud to say my work is doing wonders, the kids that we are mentoring are able to find direction in life, they now know what they want to be as they grow up and they are able to identify subjects they want to study and career they want to pursue. Families that we have been in contact with, families that are from different background are able to identify their skills and they are able to grow and turn them into businesses.â€
In essence, Mrs. Portiah S Mokgathong stands as a pillar of strength and a source of inspiration in Botswana. Her unwavering commitment to fostering gender equality, community upliftment, and personal development lights the way for others. Through her relentless endeavors and steadfast dedication, she renders a profound impact on her community and beyond, etching a durable mark of empowerment and optimism.